[originally posted August 14, 2003]
these cuts run deeper than than your soul will ever be. my scars are more permanent than your [lust/love]. ... what you call insanity, i call me... MAGNIFIED. head aching with misery. eyes blurry. touch me now and i just may pretend you're someone else. your smell makes me dizzy. if i fall it will be your fault... except i was the one spinning around in circles. i know what you're going to say. what is this aching in my gut? i'm bleeding but i can't find the source of pain to stop it. your jokes won't mend this one. i gasp as a sudden realization brings me to my knees. it wasn't you. it was me who drew the dagger. what do i see as i look down? a dull blood-covered knife in MY hand. so what if i'm crazy, i'm a fucking maniac. ...at least i'm not boring, right ash? how can i say i love you back.. you never made me happy. this is not the time... when broken is easily fixed. YOU drive me crazy. no not you, YOU. whatever you do, don't say you love me. you gave up everything. i never said i'd give it back.
there is commonly sufficient space around us
ReplyDelete[originally posted November 20, 2003)
something that matters...
the work force and all the offices insist that i write something that matters. but how is such a thing feasible when all is dependent on relativism?
you’re sleeping sound in your bed while i’m still held back by the restraints of the night. at your leisure, attempt to wake up, and you will find that we all remain trapped in this solitude despite our desperate reaches to escape. if it provides consolation- know you are not alone in your lonliness; for i suffer from the darkness to the same degree as the next man.
i love to be alone. i never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude
ah! such great words that set an optimistic tone for a rather depressing scene.
this is no cry for help, nor a plea distraction; but merely a testament to the emotions we kept hidden behind the oxygen in our blood, never breathing a word through our lips.
ambiguous character 1: forget me.
ambiguous character 2: no, forget me.
ambiguous character 3: we will all be forgotten with time.
"right ash?"
ReplyDeletejust forget me, it's that simple!
ReplyDelete